2.6.8  Weddings Taking Place in Other Dioceses 

In an increasing number of cases, couples are getting married outside of the Archdiocese of Chicago. Sometimes this is for practical reasons (their families live elsewhere and they wish to be married in the community where they were raised). At other times, it is because they wish to celebrate their marriage in a certain setting. 

The importance of a community of faith needs to be explained to the couple. A wedding is not merely for the couple themselves. It is a statement to the faith community, and also a promise from that community. It is for this reason that the Church says that couples are to get married in either the parish of the bride or the parish of the groom. If they are going to get married elsewhere, their proper pastors need to give permission. 

Procedure

Marriage preparation would take place as usual, but it will be necessary to complete all the marriage papers as soon as possible. Couples should be made aware of the fact that requirements for marriage differ in other dioceses and other countries. It is the couple’s responsibility to find out what will be required of them according to the civil law, diocesan regulations, and parish policies of the place where they are marrying. The Archdiocese of Chicago cannot demand that other dioceses conform to our policies; the couple must conform to theirs. 

If the couple is getting married elsewhere in order to avoid a law in the State of Illinois (such as the law prohibiting the marriage of first cousins), they should check with a civil lawyer to see if there are any civil law consequences of their action.

If the couple plans to marry in a location where neither of their families lives, the following questions would be appropriate:

·         Who is going to be able to attend the wedding ceremony?

·         Are they making reasonable requests of family members or friends to attend the wedding?

·         What do they imagine will be the effect upon the members of their families who will not be able to attend?

·         What do they imagine will be the effect upon them if not all of the family is able to be present? Try to get the couple to imagine, not just the setting of their wedding, but taking this most important step in their lives with only a few people present. (Some couples have expressed disappointment afterwards when they realized they were getting married in a church that was nearly empty.) 

It would also be appropriate to discuss the couple’s relationship with the Church and their membership in a parish, since they will be getting married far from that community. 

Preparation

In addition to your own preparation with the couple, they should attend the marriage preparation program that best suits their situation (see Appendix D). 

Paperwork

All the requirements for marriage papers in the diocese where the marriage is to take place must be met. The fact that such papers are not required in the Archdiocese of Chicago does not mean they are not required elsewhere. If the couple is unsure of what is being asked for, you can contact the Office for Canonical Services  (see Appendix G).

The marriage papers must be sent to the Office for Canonical Services. The bishop of the Catholic party must grant any dispensations. The papers are then sent to the diocese where the marriage is to take place, which will review the papers and send them on to the parish where the marriage is going to take place.

Please make copies of all the papers before you send them to the Office for Canonical Services. Depending on the country where the marriage is taking place, it may be easier if the couple hand-carries the papers there when they go for their wedding.

At times, only one party is here; the other party either lives in another country or has returned there to make wedding preparations. In that case, you may only be filling out half of the pre-nuptial questionnaire, with the other half being filled out when the person arrives in the country where they are to be married. In that case, send the papers to the Office for Canonical Services for a “nihil obstat.” The papers will be returned to you so that the person can take them with them when they go for their wedding.